5 Things You Can Do When Metro North Gets Delayed
I love Metro North and the access it gives me to anything in or around NY City. I have taken the train from Poughkeepsie to Grand Central so many times that every now and again I'll experience a delay. This is when you are on the train but it has to stop for an extended period of time. It's almost always outside of the conductor's control and while it can be an inconvenience I prefer to keep a positive attitude about it and just find things to entertain myself while I wait. Here are 5 things you can do when Metro North gets delayed.
1. Start an impromptu game of duck duck goose.
This works easiest if you are with a group of friends going down to a Yankee or Met Game. Start off by having them separate into different rows and you just walk down the isle tapping your friend's heads with a gentle "Duck, duck..duck." There are two options with this situation, you can can pick one of your friends, yell "GOOSE" and try to make it to the end of the car before they catch you. The high risk option is to pick a total stranger and tap them on the head. This may cause complications though. The potential penalty for violation of personal space, which is already limited on public transportation could be costly. It could be hilarious though, if you convince the stranger to play along.
2. Pretend to be a blogger for a major news network.
This one works best if you are alone but will work if you are among friends. Take out our smart phone and stand up near the front of the car. Hold your phone in horizontal selfie mode, works best if you are wearing an earpiece with a microphone attached. Do a pretend news report for a major news network's website. "This is So and So, reporting live for blah blah blah.COM." Loudly speculate it could be up to 5 hours before the train will start moving again. Insist on getting interviews.
3. Practice your improve skills.
This is only funny if you don't know anyone else in the train car. Stand up and face everyone. Start acting out charades. Be very serious about it. Make eye contact. When someone shouts out a guess, stomp your feet and with attitude say “don’t distract me, I’m practicing!” Rinse and repeat until it feels like you are about to be in a Worldstar video, than it's advised you stop. Perhaps switch cars just to be safe.
4. Get your catfish preparation done.
This is another single rider option. Ask someone to take their photo, preferably of the same gender. If they say yes, ask them afterwards if you can use their photo as your catfish tinder profile picture.
5. Stare at your phone
Seriously, just stare at your smart phone. Go from app to app checking social media and read stupid internet blog posts like this one. It's what you were doing anyway, and this doesn't have potentially dangerous consequences. Unless you're checking tumblr, that could be risky in public.
In the end, we will all experience delays in public transportation. But don't let that stop you from using it. It's better for the environment and allows you to multitask. If you have any clever things to do when Metro North gets delayed, email me firstname.lastname@example.org. Maybe I'll make another list!