81-Year-Old Man Arrested For Having Sex With Shrubs

Some people believe everyone has a soulmate. This story begs the question: could that soulmate be a plant?

An 81-year-old man from Stratford, Connecticut was arrested and charged with public indecency and second-degree breach of peace after a neighbor saw him having sexual relations with a shrub.

A neighbor saw the act in progress and recorded video of the incident, which was then shown to the police as evidence. Police say that after being confronted by the neighbor, the Casanova of shrubbery apologized, covered his exposed self with a grill cover, and returned to his own home.

He was released after paying a $10,000 bond and is due in Superior Court on August 5th.

The shrub could not be reached for a statement.