Tales of a Non-Parallel Parking Driver in the Hudson Valley

Confession time - it's been 23+ years since I have attempted to parallel parked a car, and even that was a stretch.

The last (and really only) time I even tried to parallel park was during my road test; the year was 2001, I took my test in Millbrook, and the person told me to park between a traffic cone and a stop sign.

I passed, barely.

Do You Know How to Parallel Park?

Fast forward twenty plus years and I am known as THAT person in my friend group...

• the one who is always willing to drive, unless we're going somewhere where there's only street parking
• the one who will hop out of the car in a busy intersection to switch drivers to avoid parallel parking
• the one who will drive around in circles waiting for an easy pull in spot instead of even trying

I'm not quite sure what my issue is, but I just tense up and don't quite understand the physics of how my car will be able to get into that space with a stationary vehicle on either side of it.

Every couple of years someone gives me a pep talk and is convinced they'll be the one to teach me, and every single time I punk out and can't make it happen.

Even my mother, who grew up in Queens and can beautifully parallel park her car, probably in her sleep, has given up hope with me.

The photo above, my biggest nightmare, 100% serious. I'll admit it, I have parallophobia - real thing, the internet said so.

Are There Hudson Valley Areas You'll Avoid Because of Parking?

True story, just last week I was in Beacon with my best friend who lives in CT and we were trying to scope out the parking situation. Couldn't find one that did not require parallel parking so we pulled over by the dummy light, switched drivers and she got the job done while commenting on my insane phobia.

I tend not to be the driver in areas like Beacon, some parts of Poughkeepsie, or even New Paltz during busy times, because I know that chances are we'll have to street park, and I'll make a fool of myself.

Are there any areas you avoid, or anyone else in the same (pathetic) boat as me?