Who’s the Mystery Person Tossing Porn All Over the Hudson Valley?

I was a student at Rondout Valley high school in Ulster County when I came across my first explicit roadside literature. My16-year-old self must have had some sort of Spidey -sense because even as I was approaching the discarded magazines at 45 miles-per-hour, I remember thinking, "those can't be what I think they are". They were.

Roughly 50 magazines were strewn across the road as if somebody was on the way to throw them out but couldn't wait another minute, or a very dedicated collector forgot that they left their latest haul on top of their car's roof before taking off down the winding back road where I found their sexy pollution. Imagine my surprise when I discovered it's still happening in 2022.

X-Rated Litter

It's raining men... and women, apparently. This was not the Facebook update I was expecting to see this morning, but I have to admit my first thought was: "wow, I'm not the only one!"

Porn DVDs are still being tossed out of cars. Found two this morning

Bow-Chika-Wow-Wow in Beacon

While there's no way to know if the porn litterbug I encountered back in 2003 in Accord is the same one tossing DVDs around Beacon in 2022, the M.O. certainly looks the same. And according to the Facebook poster, this wasn't the first time it's happened. Under her original post, another user commented "Sooo its not just my lawn lmao [it's] all over the place??" "Twice now", she replied. Another commenter simply asked, "...still?"

Who's the Culprit?

This is a baffling case. I don't know if I'm more surprised at the fact that people are tossing porn on the streets all over the Hudson Valley, or that adult DVDs still actually exist in 2022. I guess it's cheaper than throwing laptops with a browser open to their favorite NSFW website out of their window instead. Part of me is a little happy this is still happening, if only for the absurd mystery of it all.

Dear Porn Litterer

So dear sir.. or ma'am (but let's admit there's a 99.999% chance that this is a man), if it's possible I would like to simultaneously thank and scold you for your actions. Yes, you made a teenager's day almost 2 decades ago, and I'm sure (at least I hope) your intentions are pure (or at least as pure as they can be), but this isn't the way. Sure, magazines can slowly dissolve back into the earth, but plastic, like the kind in DVD case, takes hundreds of years to decompose and adds even more pollution to an already-suffering world. Plus, haven't you heard of Craigslist? I promise if you list your collection in the "free" section, it'll be gone before you can say "litterbug".