With more and more legalization of cannabis-based programs being sold in and around New York State, it would be wise to understand some of the products that you may be purchasing. I have a bit of a horror story about trying a product infused with THC that left me in pretty bad shape. I told my doctor this story, and she couldn't believe what I ingested.

I Have Never Consumed Cannabis Before

Let me first preface this story by saying I had never tried any cannabis-based products of any kind up until the point. No joints, bongs, brownies, gummies, etc! I can already hear you calling me "LAME!" I was exposed to plenty of it - I went to music college, after all - but I just never had an interest in trying weed in any form.

A Seemingly Normal Dinner... in New Jersey

That being said, I met up with an old friend of mine from college for dinner recently. For the sake of the restaurant and the product that this story concerns, I'm going to leave out names. All I will say is that my friend and I went to eat at a golf course in New Jersey.

"Try These New Hard Seltzers!"

While my friend and I were taking a look at the menus, we saw signs for these new hard seltzers that the restaurant was now offering. My friend asked about these seltzers and the waitress told us they are these new THC-infused hard seltzers. We asked her what she thought of them, and she says they are nice to take the edge off. So, we ordered some!

Bottoms Up!

My friend and I finished our cans before our meals arrived. We thought they tasted great, and we were curious how much THC was actually in a single can. We looked, and it said 60 mg per can! Now, my friend and I had no idea how much that truly was. He texted his sister who takes gummies for health reasons, and she said that her gummies are anywhere between 5 - 10 mg. She said we were in for it!

Know Your Dose - THC Dosing Statistics

If you are like my friend and I, and have no idea what the dosages mean, I recommend taking a look at the list below. According to Leafly, a website focused on cannabis use and education, says

  • 1 - 2.5 mg (Microdose): Most users don't experience intoxication at this dose, but may feel that their pain, anxiety, and nausea have abated without affection their cognition
  • 3 - 5 mg (Low): This dose helps with pain, nausea, inflammation, and may help with sleep. New users will likely feel a degree of intoxication, including feeling less coordinated and more silly. A 5 mg dose is when a "high" begins to set in for many new and inconsistent consumers.
  • 10 - 15 mg (Moderate): This is an ideal dose for more experienced users looking to have fun, sleep, or managed pain. New users may feel overwhelmed.
  • 20 - 30 mg (High): This does is only recommended for experienced edible consumers: expect strong euphoria and impaired coordination and/or perception. May be beneficial for chronic illness, insomnia or severe pain.
  • 50 - 100 mg (Acute): An effective dose for experienced users seeking relief from intense physical pain, PMS, MS, cancer treatment and other conditions. Not recommended for those dealing with mental health issues. May cause nausea or disrupt the emotions of inconsistent consumers.
  • 100 - 500 mg (Macrodose): A useful dose for patients with GI absorption issues and other severe medical conditions such as cancer. This is an intensely intoxicating dose, and many users risk experiencing adverse effects. Consume with caution and intention.

According to that, my friend and I had an "Acute" dosage of THC in a very short period of time. Also, mind you, I have never consumed any kind of THC before. I was in for a rough night.

The Spins Begin...

I felt fine through most of dinner. That was until I had to go to the bathroom before we were about to leave. As I'm washing my hands, my vision started to cloud over, I was having the spins, I was nauseous, I was sweating intensely and I felt disconnected from my body. I have never felt anything like this before.

I manage to get to a stall and just sit down. After a few minutes, I slowly text my friend that I am not doing well. I remember he came in to check on me, and I sat there for a little while longer.

...How Did I Get Here?

The next thing I know, he and I are walking on the golf course. I had no idea when or how we got out onto the course. He was talking to me, and I had no idea what was going on. My short term memory was shot. I had to remind myself where I was and who I was with every 3 seconds. Somehow I was walking, but I did not feel in control of my motor skills whatsoever.

Driving Felt Like Going at Hyper Speed

My friend and I manage to get back to the car - we left my car at his work, and carpooled to the restaurant. The drive was terrifying. I'm gripping the console and the safety handle as I felt like I was sinking into my seat. Again, my friend is talking to me, and I did my best to answer back, but I didn't feel coherent.

Should I Drive Home? CAN I Drive Home?

We get back to my car. I ask him if he is okay, and he said he felt great. We said goodbye and he drove off. I get in my car, and without turning it on, I just sat there. I had no perception of time whatsoever. I may had only been sitting down for a few minutes, but it felt like hours. I was still having the spins, and I was so disoriented. I knew there was no way I could drive back to Poughkeepsie.

I Did Not Know How to Use My Phone

I had a very difficult time operating my phone, but I managed to look up hotels near me. I lucked out - there was a hotel 5 minutes walking distance. Good, because I could not drive. I gathered my things, I locked the car, and I made my way to the hotel. It was a pretty terrifying experience because I did not trust my legs. I felt like I was playing a 3rd-person video game, as if I was experiencing myself from the outside. I felt like I had no coordination, and as if I was walking off a cliff with every step.

Try Playing Live-Action Frogger While High

This next part I really do not recommend. I had to cross a highway to get to the hotel. It was dark, and the lights from the cars were disorienting. Luckily, I was able to use the cross walk to get across, but I felt in a dream-like state. I felt like I could've gotten hit by a car at any time, despite utilizing the traffic lights and the crosswalk.

I Think The Hotel Overcharged Me...

I make it into the hotel and I'm trying to book a room with the clerk at the front desk. I know that we were talking, but I could barely comprehend what he was saying. Yet, somehow, I was responding back to him. It felt involuntary. I felt like I was incapacitated and I was watching someone else have this conversation rather than have it myself. It felt like it took an hour to check in, though I'm sure it was only a couple of minutes. By this time, I was so profusely thirsty so I asked for some bottles of water. He gave me the bottles, my keycard, and I wondered my way to the elevator (which was terrifying to ride) and get to my room. Honestly, I paid a pretty penny for the room, but if that's what it took to survive the night, so be it!

I Called 988 - The Crisis Hotline

I just laid there on my bed staring at the ceiling not knowing what to do. I tried watching TV or watching videos on my phone, but it felt as if I was sprayed by The Scarecrow's toxins from Batman Begins. I ended up calling 988, the Crisis Hotline. I didn't know what to do with myself. I couldn't text using my phone to save my life, but I was able to dial at least. I spoke with the representative for some time. She asked if I needed medical attention. I told her I had no idea, hence why I was calling her! After we assessed my situation, she felt since I was safe in the hotel room, I'd be okay.

Following that call with the Crisis Hotline, I had some awkward phone calls with my girlfriend and my parents. Instead of drunk-calling, I high-called them. Many laughs were shared at my expense, but everyone was still naturally concerned. My friend called me when he got home to see if I made it home safe, and was shocked to hear that I checked into a hotel. My friend said he barely felt any effect from the seltzer, and he too is not used to anything with THC. Apparently I got the brunt of it. Throughout my phone calls, I could've sworn hours were going by. My girlfriend recounted how hilarious it was when I'd be like, "How is it not 10 o'clock yet! It's only 9:17?! It was 9:15 an hour ago!" Needless to say, I had no concept of time.

Homeward Bound

After a few hours of hilariously awkward phone conversations and feeling as if the bed was going to swallow me whole, I finally went to bed. The next day, I felt fine, drove back to Poughkeepsie, and held an interview for one of my shows. I won't tell you which one, but I will say that my sounded as if I was still high while conducting that interview.

Worst Experience of My Life

Needless to say, that was one of the worst experiences of my life. I've been brought to the hospital for concussions, severe pain, sports injuries, etc, but I would take any of those things any day before experiencing this again. I don't like feeling out of control like that. It felt dangerous and none of it felt real. Though I was able to give you a step by step retelling of the night, there are moments that are foggy. Like, the few conversations I had, I remember that I had them, but I barely remember what was said. Also, on the way to the hotel, I remember being at my car and then I remember the highway. I don't remember how I got to said highway.

The moral of the story is that if you're going to try any cannabis-based products, understand the dosage, your consumption habits, and how consumption could effect your current medical state.

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