Drunk Nebraska Lady Learns Tiger Cage Isn’t Part of the Petting Zoo

Look, tigers are cool as heck. I'm a huge fan. They're majestic, beautiful animals. But more importantly, and what I like most about them, is that they don't take any crap from anyone and have not only the ability, but the willingness to absolutely and utterly dismantle anything or anyone that gets in their way.

My admiration for tigers is such that if it doesn't directly affect a team I root for, I always casually root for the Cincinnati Bengals and the Detroit Tigers.

Seriously, look at that tiger up there. Dude is so bad-ass it's hard for the brain to fathom. In fact, let's look at another rad tiger:

Damn. That's a rad tiger.

Knowing what we know about tigers--that they're cool, relentless badasses that won't hesitate to show you that they can rip you apart--one would think that a good idea would be avoiding them. Y'know. For safety.

Unfortunately, a woman from Nebraska didn't take these personality traits into consideration when she went to the zoo. Story below.